What are the hard and fast rules of Creative Writing? Are there, in fact, any rules at all? Professor Frosty-butterpillow-protagonistic-showerhead-flowerpot-dog-eating-fryingpan-massglorious has all of the answers, though they may be most unwelcome to a rigid, rule-following mind. But if you can just hold off on going to the dean to drop the class in an exasperated snit, you will surely learn a thing, or two, or even thirty-five things from the professor, even if an elephant shoots out of your chest before the class is through.